JWI: Just Wing It

Spontaneity. I used to fear it, now I embrace it. Today, an example of how spontaneity and laughter brightens up the day of complete strangers. Vulnerability.

As I sat down with a wholesome Persian dinner with Roya, I contemplated and was proud of what I achieved today.

It symbolised truly what I spoke about in yesterday’s blog.

Looking back, today marks somewhat of a milestone.

A time where I wasn’t prepared but let myself be vulnerable and didn’t care for the consequences.

I think people would call these ‘growth moments’.

I don’t know if I’ll ever get to a level like Gary Vaynerchuk – someone who loves himself unconditionally and feeds from criticism.

He doesn’t apologise for who he is nor wants to appease everyone.

He understands and trusts that he knows best and he doesn’t need validation from anyone.

Anyone.

He has a wife and kids but he supports himself emotionally.

Today I adopted a Vaynerchuk-like approach.

I won’t lie and say that I tried to prepare moments before. I did. It was tragic and I was fumbling around trying to figure out who I was as a person and what I wanted to represent.

Moments before I rose up to speak to fifty-plus students, I forgot all I read and just was me.

Pure, unapologetic me.

Context: these students were prospective study abroad applicants for all around the world. They had already received offers and I was giving a speech about my experiences of study abroad.

I completely winged it.

I spoke about my experiences sure, but I also articulated through laughter and sly hints about serious issues. That light-heartedness that I tried to convey is the epitome of my personality.

I rambled, yes. But I did it in a way where I was comfortable. I left myself be free and talk about topics that I found to be interesting.

It wasn’t your standard, pre-scripted spiel.

A student going to UT Austin (happens to be on Geography too) said that the event wasn’t good until I came up with that funny account. Whether he said that to appease me or not – I felt that too.

I don’t know if I made anyone feel less stressed or more comfortable with their situation.

But from a selfish perspective, I heard a lot of laughs and I felt the energy in the room.

Another public speaking event down.

Another chance to vulnerable.

Another fear conquered.

Talking about fear.

Fear is my second favourite emotion. Fear comes to me when I’m criticised.

I told this to Roya, amongst others, that when someone criticises something you do – you’re doing something right.

They’ve taken the time out of their day to make you feel worse for their own gain. That decision took thought. They care enough. Someone who’s doing well has the toughest critics.

Fear makes me feel sick in my stomach, momentarily.

It makes me feel vulnerability to a scale I would never have imagined it.

I love it because I always overcome it.

There’s always a way. There’s always a solution.

Whether you need help to get there – there’s always a path out.

You’re the only one stopping you breaking free. You have the power to define your own destiny.

Fear comes into that.

Winging it today was fearful. I didn’t want to waste anyone’s time. In that same vein, I didn’t care what they got out of it (selfishly).

I take this as public speaking experience. An opportunity to be my best version of me.

Something that I can’t wait to more of in the future.

Lesson of the day:

Be vulnerable, love fear and more importantly just laugh.

Life is hard enough without a laugh and joke.