NFP: No Fake People
Fake. A word thrown in anger. A word utilised by the leader of the free world. So it must be an important word, right? Today’s society has twisted it.
Fake people don’t exist as far as I’m concerned.
I’ve thrown the word around in the past when I disapprove of someone’s actions, of course I have. I’m human. And a walking contradiction, never forget it.
It’s almost a natural reaction to have as millennials.
It’s ludacris. Not the American rapper, the adjective.
I have a theory about why people may seem ‘fake’.
But first a word about Americans in general.
When I embarked on study abroad, I had sterotypes. I was scared I was going to be stigmatised for the colour of my skin.
‘Texans are racists, homophobes, republicans, Trump-loving hillbillies’
This narrative was common amongst friends, colleagues and customers who had found out of my departure and sent their prayers.
Most people had not stepped outside the UK or Europe and had no reason to judge. I had visited but had no interactions with ‘true’ Americans. This was my first chance.
I’m almost like a record player on repeat. Since I’ve been back, I’ve not stopped defending Americans for their kindesss. Especially Texans. The alcoholic drink Southern Comfort is the best way to describe Texan hospitality.
There are, like anywhere you go, people you don’t gel with and that is fine. Society is not one big community for a reason. Segregation exists for a reason. I’m talking about people who want to be separate, not those stigmatised by culture or politics.
Generally, people were accommodating and interested in my story. I was different in that scenario, but the same applied to locals too.
Flip to the other side of the coin now and we have Kaylie.
Kaylie is from Connecticut studying in Philadelphia. She’s American, not Texan. But given my description about Texan niceness, you wouldn’t have guessed. She epitomises what a good person is all about. I’ve enjoyed hanging out and learning about her story, I’ll be sad to wave her goodbye in under a month’s time.
More to the point, she’s studying abroad here and she probably had stereotypes about British people (because yes that works both ways). Speaking to her, it seems that any inhibitions were broken.
Okay, we get it… but how does this relate to fake people?
Just as the American president parades fake news across his news conferences, society and millennials are quick to throw this word into everyday vocabulary.
I believe that people who appear ‘fake’ are those who are trying to find themselves.
They aren’t confident in themselves so they imitate a persona that is seen to be socially acceptable.
Often these people act differently in groups than alone, this is to fit in and mix correctly to avoid isolation.
The truth of it is that most people hate to feel isolated.
The world is a busy and noisy place, being and feeling alone is the worst feeling.
I’m not saying I’ve found myself and I’m sure people have said that I’m fake in the past.
I’m definitely more confident in my ability to make friendships with people based on real, intellectual and meaningful conversation. That’s just how I go about things.
‘Fake’ people need to be given slack. We all do.
Give yourself a break and focus on yourself, you’ll be considered to be less fake and you’ll actually feel better.
‘Fake’ people is a term we use to protect ourselves from our own insecurities.
Time to change.