Reflect And Go
It’s the first day of the new month. I think it’s worth reflecting the first half of the year. Before the whirlwind of hard work and travel begins. Reflect and go.
‘When a lot happens in quick succession, it’s hard to drop a thought. It’s hard to think the world could ever be against you. It’s wrong. I take the time, now more than ever.’
The difference between myself now and myself two years ago isn’t too profound.
It’s not too noticeable.
That’s if you look from the outside.
Start a conversation, and you’ll see a change.
Even in the last six months.
There is a difference in the way I present ideas. With facts rather than speculation.
I speak more confidently and with conviction.
Not a lot happened; I became open and transparent.
I always tried to be honest. Now, there’s no excuse.
The blog is the most significant accountability mechanism I have.
People call me out all the time.
It’s a matter of growing, learning why things I say aggravate people and it leads to more intelligent and perceptive conversation.
The change came through understanding. Through appreciating and through knowing more, not guessing.
From my internship with all foreign-born colleagues to my speech, I gave on Friday at City Hall.
A lot of these opportunities I created.
A lot of them resulted from references and recommendations.
Take my internship starting in August. A referral to a top company and the rest is history.
I outwardly believe I deserve these opportunities. I wouldn’t go as far as to say that no-one else deserves them too.
But, selfishly speaking, I did deserve these.
Even the failures, I deserved them too.
I think I’ve had a fair first six months of the year.
I’m more in control of myself than I have ever been.
I’m grateful.
So grateful.
For everything. Because I know that all of this success is premature.
It’s two years in — that’s lucky.
Patience would dictate that this shouldn’t happen so soon.
It takes years to build a career, to have success — don’t get me wrong, I’m not at a peak — but in perspective, this is a high.
I’m trying to enjoy it.
This is really just the beginning.
This is not a small-scale success. But, it’s just the start of a more extended mission.
I don’t expect to keep climbing.
I’m expecting to plateau and descend.
Anything more is a bonus.
The difference between myself now and two years ago is more profound than I realised.
I now admit that I know it’ll be okay.
I always believed.
I just never said it aloud. And that was my insecurity.
An engrained nature to stay quiet for fear of reprisal.
But now — I don’t care — most of what I do is to help others.
I work for me, but I do everything in aid of the greater good.
My future decisions will not dictate a steady line to the top.
For the top is an elusive dream with no perception of what it holds.
When I reflect, I smile.
I remember the times where it was crap, I laugh.
Not at the times, but at the thought that I didn’t think it could improve.
My mental stability is the key to my success.
Being vulnerable and open are two keys to that puzzle.
Honest, a man of substance and compassionate.
It all counts.
I finally count!
Reflect and go.