Zen

I’m using today’s blog as it was first intended: to dump.

It’s definitely gotten lost along the way, that sense of purpose.

But in the heat of the moment, it can often seem pointless.

Pointless to write down how you feel.

Like it doesn’t matter.

Well it does.

Today, I’m brain-tired.

I’m trying to compile an essay.

It’s an intricate piece and heeding the advice of professors, I’m trying to not overcomplicate and pack too much in.

It probably wasn’t the best essay to try with, especially as it asks a lot in a measly word count.

I’m confident I’ll get it done.

I just need to stop second-guessing myself and worrying about detail over clarity.

Clarity is key.

It’s ironic, this blog helps me clarify my thoughts.

Yet sometimes my mind farts and just can’t put the words together.

I should probably take it easy the rest of the evening.

I always do this.

I want to finish a little bit of research so it makes it easier when I restart looking at this.

Should I? Shouldn’t I?

The conflict is not about the work, but the latent motivation to do it tomorrow.

I feel if I do it today, I can just collapse and sleep.

If I don’t do it, I’ll feel guilty but likely still sleep well.

I’ll just do it.

Be done with it and look forward to sleep.

These decisions I made while writing my blog was the reason I continued with it.

I should return to lengthy blogs when I feel like it.

Don’t restrict yourself.

Zen